Author: Elaine Jones

The Parish of
St Andrew’s, Bolam

Burials and Interment of Ashes in the Churchyard

Introduction
There has been a church on this site for over 800 years and many people are buried within the grounds.
The Churchyard at St Andrew’s is open for burials and for the interment of ashes. We are only permitted to allow memorial plaques for people whose remains are in the churchyard. The deceased must have had a link with the village, that they lived or worshipped here. There are statutory fees for burials and for memorials, so please ask for that information.
We are happy to talk to anyone or their family about what they would like, please do not hesitate to contact us if you have any questions or we can be of any help.
On the Day of the Funeral
If the body is being buried in the churchyard, it is usual that the Funeral Service takes place in church and then we go out to the churchyard for the burial. It may be that a grave is re-opened, or a new plot is started. If it is a new plot, it will simply be the next space. A grave space cannot be reserved without a faculty. For details on how to go about this please ask.
If a body is to be cremated, committal takes place at the Crematorium - sometimes after a service there, or after a service in Church (and please do feel welcome to use your parish church even if the deceased was not a regular
church attender). Usually the Funeral Directors will collect the ashes for you, store them carefully, and then deliver them to the Office prior to interment. On some occasions the family wish to keep them. They are accompanied by a Certificate confirming they are the ashes of your loved one. Occasionally the ashes will go into a family grave, but often will go into a separate area reserved for the burial of ashes.

The Interment of Ashes
The earliest interment of ashes could take place is 48 hours after Cremation, but many families prefer to wait longer. The date of the Interment must be arranged with the Office, and we obviously need sufficient notice to ensure we are free. If you have another family member already buried here, the ashes can be buried in their grave. We bury ashes, either in a cardboard or wooden box, or by pouring them lose into the hole, but the Church of England does not allow the scattering of ashes.
Some families like to come to a normal Sunday morning service and then go out together to the Churchyard; others prefer to meet with just their family and friends, sometimes on a Saturday; others prefer not to be present. A hole will have been dug before you arrive and the ashes will be poured in at a point during the short service - it lasts about 10 minutes. After we leave, the hole will be filled in and turf replaced.
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Flowers and Maintenance within The Churchyard
We have to get the right balance between allowing people to remember, and keeping a tidy churchyard which we can maintain. With ashes burials, since we place ashes in a designated area, there is a need for everyone to respect other people’s space. The rule is, please, just one plant pot per space. The pot should be of no more than 7 inches in diameter, and it is not fair if flowers or other plants are larger than that. Cut flowers can be placed across the plot and there is an option to buy a flower vase cube from a stonemason that can be engraved and placed on the grave..
Memorials for Ashes on Existing Graves
In the event there is no space on the existing gravestone, a flat slab, laid just below the ground is the only marker permitted for cremated remains. Open books, sloping plaques and headstones cannot be selected, even though there are others in the churchyard. Most stones in the churchyard are 18” x 12” and 2” deep. These are a world heritage feature.
Gravestones
It is wise to wait almost a year for the ground to settle before asking for permission to install a gravestone. The stonemason will provide a simple wooden cross with the deceased's name to act as a marker. This also allows time for you to decide what wording you want. However, while you may have permission to have a burial in the churchyard, the plot does not actually belong to you. The churchyard belongs to the Diocese of Newcastle therefore Diocesan regulations must be adhered to when choosing a memorial to mark your interment. This is to ensure the churchyard is in keeping with its Christian history and that it is safe.

Headstones
These have clear restrictions as detailed below. Local stonemasons have access to the regulations for what is permitted as well as the fixing. But please still check via the office before you order anything. Be aware that should the headstone become loose in the future (maybe due to the settling of the ground), you will need to have it re-fixed. If there are any headstones which pose a hazard (ie wobbly, damaged or unsafe) we reserve the right to place them flat to the ground and will only move them if absolutely necessary. If you find your stone laid flat and you wish to have it re-erected, you will need to do this at your own expense. Headstones should be no larger than 1200mm (4ft) high, measured from the surface of the ground, 900mm (3ft) wide and 150mm (6in) thick. They should be no less than 750mm (2ft 6in) high, 500mm (1ft 8in) wide and no less than 75mm (3in) thick (except in the case of slate memorials, which may be thinner but no less than 38mm (11/2in thick). These measurements are not intended to define standard proportions of memorials, and memorials may be of any dimensions within the given maxima and minima. (The metric equivalents given above are slightly less than the Imperial dimensions, but are recommended for use by the National Association of Memorial Masons.)
Type of Material
All memorials should be made of natural stone (in which case they have a polished surface on the front and on the top surface of the base only), or of hardwood. Stones traditionally used in local buildings, or stones closely similar to them in colour and texture, are to be preferred. White marble, synthetic stone or plastic are not permitted. Black, blue or red granites, and granites darker than Rustenburg grey are not permitted as they are not already common in the churchyard. Railings, chains, chippings or glass shades are not permitted
Finish
A smooth finish of the stone is permitted but only on the inscription face. Mirror polishing is not permitted.

Design
A receptacle for flowers may be incorporated in the headstone base or plaque and should be flush with the top of the stone. If you are planning to regularly place flowers this is a helpful option, since freestanding vases are considered to be a safety hazard and will be removed.
The following items are not permitted: kerbs, railings, plain or coloured chippings, containers of any kind (NB free-standing vases or glass in particular are dangerous), figure statuary, open books, birdbaths, pictorial etchings, memorials in the shape of a heart, cameos, portraiture, photographs, black, blue or red granites, marble, synthetic stone, plastic or terracotta.
A stone cross requires more specialised permission from the Diocese.
Inscriptions
These should be kept clear, simple and relevant. Images or other embellishments are not permitted to be engraved on headstones. Lettering may be painted a shade lighter or darker than the natural colour of the stone. Gilded, silvered and leaded lettering, trademarks or advertisements are not permitted. This is because the gilding fades and chips over time – particularly due to standing rainwater - leaving an inferior looking finish. Remember to leave space for a later inscription if you are anticipating a future interment. If you are adding that later inscription, it will need to be consistent with the existing style in wording and lettering. Photographs or porcelain portraits are not permitted.
Wording of the Epitaph
Please include the Christian name, surname along with age and date (or year) of death, or the years of birth and death. The object of the epitaph is “to identify the resting place of the deceased, to honour the dead, to comfort the living and to inform posterity.” They should therefore be simple and relevant. Nick-names are not considered suitable and if scripture text is used it is unnecessary to give the reference. Quotations may be taken from the Bible; the prayer book, hymns. Poetry and prose may be suitable sources so long as the quotation is consistent with Christian belief.

7. Memorial Permission
Once you have decided on your memorial, in consultation with the funeral director or stone mason, they will write to the church for authorisation. Alterations may be requested before the memorial can be produced and erected. Any memorials placed without permission will be removed.
Flowers and Maintenance of Graves
We have to get the right balance between allowing people to remember, and keeping a tidy churchyard which we can maintain. On graves themselves there is more space, but the area has to be maintained and the grass cut - a job which cannot be done to a good standard if lots of pots have to be moved first.
Our Churchyard is open all day every day for whenever you would like
to visit, but we would ask that you follow these simple guidelines:
Please do not add anything freestanding to your area – particularly lights, windmills, toys, photographs, lanterns, edging, gravel, plant pots or vases (also see earlier list). These will be removed and kept for safe keeping. In exceptional circumstances, a grace period may be granted for memorials after the funeral of a child.
If you want to sow new grass seed or cut the grass around your loved
ones grave, that would be appreciated.
You are also welcome to bring fresh flowers, preferably out of polythene and set safely into a sunken vase.
Please avoid long-term planting, as further permission is required, plus trees and shrubs can cause particular problems when roots go deep.
It really helps us if you can take all your rubbish away with you when you leave. Thank you.

Except for the periods of Advent and Lent, there are always flowers in Church. The church has a flower co-ordinator and they would be happy to talk to you if you would like your loved one commemorated that way (perhaps on the anniversary of their death). They can be contacted via the church office.
There is a working party of people who meet regularly and keep the churchyard tidy, and they would be glad of your support. Being an open churchyard we receive no financial or practical help from the Diocese or County Council to maintain or improve the churchyard. If you wish to help, please contact the church office or have a chat with the vicar or churchwardens.
If you have any queries about the information in this leaflet, or wish to arrange an interment, please contact Sadie Flanagan (Church Administrator) in the church office at wansbeckvicarhelp@gmail.com or call 01670 943414. alternatively, you can get in touch via the website mitfordandwansbeckchurches.com

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